Wednesday, May 11, 2011
O Wise One Wednesday - Home Edition
Fasting for DeNae to blog more than once a week is just going hungry, people. Write it down.
This week's O-WOW comes to you from the Home Improvement Well O' Wisdom, and it's something I've advised you on before. But it bears repeating. Like, every ten minutes.
Never paint a wall you can't see.
"Why would I do such a foolish thing?" you ask.
I'll tell you why.
You're standing on a twenty foot ladder that requires industrial hoists to move it across the room. You have a pan of paint that is just enough bigger than the ladder's 'paint platform' that it teeters ominously every time you blink. You've just slathered up your roller. And you're maybe eighteen inches from rounding the corner.
And that fume-crazed voice in your head says, "Hey, look! You've got some extra paint on that roller. And this part of the wall is already a nice, lemon yellow. Why not just keep going, right around that corner - you know, finish things off so you don't drip?"
And the other fume-crazed voice in your head - the one in charge of moving your arm - says, "First fume-crazed voice, you are a freaking genius. Arm? Paint on."
So you just keep on a-rollin', right around that corner to a wall that, technically, is beyond your line of sight, smug in the certainty that you are the smartest, most efficient lemon-yellow paint applier ever to raid Home Depot.
Without having ever set foot in your home, without knowing how you've chosen to decorate or where you normally hang important, irreplaceable items, I can tell you without question that your wedding picture is now sporting a dashing stripe of lemon yellow paint, obliterating all evidence of the once-happy couple and drying fast.
See? I told you I was wise.