Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Can I Get a Woot Woot?!

Entrants have been entered, drawings have been drawn, and winners* are now to be announced!  Thank you all for sharing your kindness with the Blanchard family; I knew I could count on this rather remarkable virtual crowd I run with to reach out to a little boy who needs some good mojo.  You're all awesomer than the law should allow.

NOW, without further ado, here are the winners of my first and, if we're all lucky, last blog giveaway.  There's nothing quite like sitting down to write a giveaway announcement and discovering that all you really have to offer is someone else's beautiful book and your bellybutton lint collection.  Thank goodness for talented friends!  (And fake cashmere...)

The winners of my book "The Accidental Gringo" are T, KristinaLT Elliott, Veronica, and the Melanie who isn't a Jacobson.  Congratulations, girls.  Your bathroom tissue needs are officially met.

The winners of my Christmas Letter authorship are Brooke and the Melanie who IS a Jacobson.  It should be noted that my sister, Amber, also won the drawing, but like the relatives of television executives and traveling circus performers, it was believed by the contest committee (my dog Sadie) that she should not be given the award out of a sense of propriety and fair play.  What Sadie actually said was, "Give me a Cheeto or I'll piddle on your cardigan," but I knew what she meant.  So little sister, I'll write your letter, too, as long as I get to make up all the stories.

And finally, the winner of Jana Winters Parkin's gorgeous book "What Think Ye of Christmas" was Shari, who emerged from Blurkland just in the nick of time!  In all honesty, Shari left one of the sweetest comments on my blog I've ever received, and I was delighted to see that she had won this prize.

I promise to be back next week, with a post so vapid, so thoroughly inane, you'll actually hear your cerebral cortex throwing itself under a cement mixer.

Meanwhile, have a wonderful Thanksgiving, everybody! 

*Couple of quick rules for winners:

Everyone:  You have until December 1 to claim your incredibly sought-after and uber coveted prizes.  After that I run them through the shredder.  (Except Jana's book, which I will sell to the highest bidder.)  And I'll need mailing addresses from the book winners.  E-mail me at, por favor.

Gringo Winners:  Keep in mind that this was my first book.  Even Moses got better with practice, and he had a lot of help from his editor.

Letter Winners:  I'll need names, dates, ages, genders, and other interesting details for your letters.  I am a humor writer.  If  your relatives somehow wind up believing you've adopted a llama named Juan Valdez, I advise you just run with it.  Your letters will be somewhere between 1,000 & 1,200 words (HA! You thought I was going to say pages, huh?) so let's keep to the salient facts and relevant lies, ok?  Also, if you want it set to poetry, or a Christmas song, I'll need to know immediately so I can get reservations at the Copyright Infringement Hilton.

Shari:  I have no contact information from you, darling.  Be sure to e-mail me your address!


brudcrew said...

Oh... for a minute there I thought I was the Brooke who won the letter authorship. Dang, now I'll have to be forced to write my own drivel and you will have to read it! Ha, so there!

Kristina P. said...

Woot, woot! You are going to hand deliver the book, right? Is the paper soft enough to blow my nose with?

T said...

congrats to the winners - I would be upset and all... but really I was happy to spread my cheery cheer :)

Hel said...

woot crappity crap woot. That's what the losers say (especially when they are PMSing).

I hope your event goes OFF DeNae! Now I am off to read Shari's comment.

veronica said...

Yay! I can't wait to read your book. Once I'm finished will you take me to Puerto Rrrrrrico?

Brooke said...

YES!! I am sooooo excited for my Christmas letter. Thank you! Thank you!!

Hey Jessica, be watching your mailbox for your copy. :-)

Kazzy said...

Oh so jealous of the Christmas letter winners!

AS Amber said...

Sadie!!!! You bad bad dog! I thought we were friends! See if I ever let my two year old ride you like a pony again!

Congrats to all the winners! Hel made me laugh. Shari's comment really was very sweet. And I'm not surprised you bring joy to her every time you grace us with a post. Pretty site you do that for all of us!

Good luck this weekend! I so wish I could be there. Happy Thanksgiving! I'll miss sharpening my elbows with you for Black Friday!

Love you!

AS Amber said...

Sure. Pretty SURE. Not site.

charrette said...

Trying so hard not to covet....

Congrats to all these winners, many of whom I know and love!

And it must be the universe deciding Shari needs my book, because she won one during my giveaway too. Amazing odds!

And finally...your bathroom tissue line made my day! (Okay, night. And it's late.)

Melanie Jacobson said...

Ha ha ha ha! At first I thought you were toying with my emotions, defeat snatched from the jaws of victory and all that. But then it turns out I DID win and I won what I wanted the very most. YAY! Info coming soon! Good luck with our Christmas letter. This is what you're dealing with. True story: yesterday I said it was too bad I didn't have one more wooden bowl to use to set out some homemade fudge. Kenny said, "Don't worry about it." Then he went and MADE one, right then, on his lathe. Out of a stump I wrangled into the back of my van after a tree blew over in a microburst at Bear Lake, UT this August. I was only a couple of minutes ahead of the road crew driving around clearing up the detritus when I stole it. So this should be a FANTASTIC letter, hahahaha!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Woot Woot!

And dangit! I missed that whole Gringo contest. I want one of them books.

L.T. Elliot said...

HOORAY! I get the gringo book! Works out perfectly since I'm a gringo! =D

Congratulations to all the winners! Thanks DeNae!

Melanie said...

So excited I won!! I'm only half gringo so I'm hoping it will still make sense.