Guess who's coming to my house? No, not the health department, although given the state of my cooking lately that's a good guess.
No, the real soon-to-arrive house guest is ... HELEN PETERSON!
I know! I couldn't be more delighted if she were carpooling with Elvis!
She's on her way to General Conference, which I hope to remember to link to something informational but if not, the nutshell version is it's this generally conferencey thing the LDS church does twice a year in Salt Lake City.
That's right, Zion-ettes: HEL is comin' to CONFERENCE!!
But first, she's getting revved up by stopping over in Vegas. It's going to be an evening of pole dancing and gambling away the rent, by which I mean we'll be baking cookies and gabbing 'til midnight.
Helen was one of my first friends in blogland. She was my bloggy friend before I even knew such things as bloggy friends existed. She's Australian, and just recently moved to Arizona. Yet another of life's mysteries: Why does someone voluntarily move from AUSTRALIA to ARIZONA? Did they even GOOGLE Arizona first?
Anyway, her imminent arrival has had my 14-year old developing a list of questions for me to "slip in" to our conversation tonight. It includes the following:
- How do you pronounce "Melbourne"?
- How do you pronounce "Wallaby"?
- How do you pronounce "Rugby"?
- Did you ever find Nemo? (That one is funny every single time he says it. Really. We're in stitches over here.)
- How do you pronounce "Mate"?
- How do you pronounce "I'm sorry, officer. We drive on the left side of the road where I come from. I hope your motorcycle's all right."
Helen is going to learn all sorts of things about me while she's here, the first being that I live in a perpetual state of what decorating magazines refer to as "before". We've painted any wall that Avon ladies and Jehovah's Witnesses are likely to see; beyond that things are pretty... um ... Spartan.
Everything is clean; it's almost totally unlikely that she or Isabel will contract a communicable disease while they're here. That's a relief. When Annie, Kristina, and Amber visited in June, Kristina caught Wayne Newton's toupee and Annie came down with a baby. But we've Lysolled everything, so the Peterson girls should be fine.
Anyway, just thought I'd make you jealous and stuff.
Have a Hel-acious weekend! You know I will!