Saturday, December 12, 2009

Keep The Receipt

The following incident actually took place in this very house. See why we need fudge every single day during the month of December? Stop trying to convince me that a little ibuprofen and a brisk walk around the block will have the same benefits.

December 12:

Today was one of those shopping days when you left the house announcing that if those dishes weren't done when you got back, you swear, you'd give all the kids' presents to homeless people, you meant it, that kitchen better SHINE, you'd better be able to EAT off those dishes.

However, upon returning home six exhausted hours later you discovered that every dish in the house had been used as a candle holder on account of the girls thinking what the house really needed was a little Christmas ambiance, and of course they had to borrow dishes from the neighbors to eat their mac n' cheese off of because all YOUR dishes were inexplicably covered in wax.

And when you shrieked (mouth full of fudge) that you wanted the kitchen CLEAN, you're pretty sure you made that CLEAR, they said with perfectly straight faces and just a touch of wounded bewilderment, "We didn't know you wanted it done today..."

Better have truckloads of fudge on hand, because this will happen more than once during the season.

17 comments:

Kimberly said...

I'm just loving the almost-sweeter-than-fudge reminder that my daughters will be doing my dishes one day.

Might even be worth all the lego I picked up yesterday. No wait, that was their daddy's...(help! I'm surrounded!).

wonder woman said...

I believe every bit of that story.

Teenagers are going to be SO MUCH FUN.

The Garden of Egan said...

Sheesh DeNae, I don't see what the problem is.............
pass the fudge.

Happy Mom said...

That IS my life, right there, on your blog!!! How did that happen?

Mallory said...

My little sister uses that excuse all the time. I never used it. Nope. Not once!

Kristina P. said...

At my previous job, I told one of the punk teenagers I worked with to "clean the refrigerator." I go to check upon him, and he had wiped down the refrigerator. I discovered I needed to be very specific.

Jami said...

So...did you give all their presents away to homeless people?

Amber Lynae said...

I'm sorry for laughing at your plight.

I would say more but now I need to go find some fudge.

Julia said...

i usually just stalk your blog in silence but I'm so loving your salute to fudge. thanks for the good laugh today!

L.T. Elliot said...

Christmas ambiance? You've got to give them kudos for using the word at least. And then beat them for the waxy plates. ;)

Kazzy said...

I love how kids say, "well, you didn't give me enough details," when it comes to jobs around the house. But when it is about something serious you want to talk to them about they aren't even close to asking for details. Whatever makes it easier for them. Love them teens. :). Actually, I really do ...

Gloria (The Mamafamilias) said...

Do some people's husbands (I won't say my, I mean, whose husband) count for this particular stress-induced fudge-fest?

Please pass the truckload of fudge.

That Girl said...

HAHAAHAHAHAHAHA!

This one is my favorite so far.

Maureen said...

And I thought it was just my teenaged SONS that got that bewildered look which has caused all those wrinkles around my eyes and mouth .......

myimaginaryblog said...

Dishes clean enough to eat off of is my new favorite line. You are so clever. It must be the fudge. (Why do I not have any fudge in my house? What is WRONG with me? How will I survive?)

Beka said...

I'm a day late, but I wanted you to know that I had a very similar conversation just this afternoon... My sweet little daughter even tried, "But Mom: 'Saturday is the day we get ready for...'" as the reason she couldn't load her plate into the dishwasher as she passed by on the way to the sofa and Ralphie.

The look on my face is the reason she didn't finish her sing-song melody!

AS Amber said...

I'll never get tired of this story. I love your kids!!!

Ba ha ha ha!!!!!