I've got so many tags from Facebook pals asking me to list 25 things no one could even fake being interested in I feel like a Blue Light special. But when Steph at Diapers and Divinity invited me to come up with a mere eight factoids, well, that seemed a bit more manageable.
Besides, I'm still procrastinating my orchestration, so I really owe Steph a big "Muchas Smoochas, Amiga!"
Anyway, here are eight things that you would never in a million years have imagined needing to know about anyone, let alone yours truly. For purely humanitarian reasons, I'll try to keep it brief:
1: I'm left handed, except for the things I do right handed. Like throwing a ball (badly; I'd have to attend Major League training camp just to get good enough to be accused of throwing like a girl), golfing (worse than throwing a ball; I'm on Scotland's "10 Most Wanted" list), and using scissors (which I almost never, ever throw, unless I'm scrapbooking, but then, of course, who could blame me).
2: Believe it or not, I am a published author. Eight years ago I wrote a book called "The Accidental Gringo", which was about life for Americans who find themselves living in Puerto Rico. It is as life-changing a literary masterpiece as my blog, but it sold enough copies (at the San Juan Borders, no less) to pay for a family trip to Disneyland. I still have a number of unsold copies of "The Accidental Gringo" on account of our family leaving PR a year earlier than we anticipated, and - here's a big shock - folks in Las Vegas just aren't that interested in a book about life in Puerto Rico. Philistines.
3: Although I grew up in Salt Lake City, UT, I have never been skiing. This may explain why I have also never broken a limb, smashed into a tree at 40 knots, or had one of those silly goggle-shaped sunburns.
4: All four of my babies were delivered by Caesarean section. This was not by choice. Apparently I have a titanium.....well, that's probably more information than you need to read in a family blog.
5: I have only ever served in one auxiliary presidency in the church, and that was the six months I was the Relief Society president in our ward on Mercer Island, WA. Evidently the Lord decided to smite Mercer Island, and this seemed the most efficient method.
6: On the other hand, I have taught Sunday School for the better part of the last 18 years. I am so "visual aid" challenged my class thinks it's Christmas if I use chalk. I assume that word of my tablecloth allergy and pinking shear paralysis got around, since....
7: ....I have never had a calling in Young Women or Relief Society, except for the aforementioned smiting.
8: Despite having a degree in music and essentially making my living as a free-lance musician, I don't listen to any music when I drive or when I'm alone at home. To me, there is no more beautiful melody than the Song of No One Bugging Me, and I like to listen to it without distractions.
Riveting stuff, huh? Admit it, you totally wish you were me. Just keep in mind, all this dazzle comes at a price, which I'm pretty sure is written on one of my tags.
Now will someone please turn off that stupid blue light?